By November, You Want to Disappear
November is threshold—after what finished, before what begins. The pull to disappear is your body, heart, and spirit asking: let something fall.
By November, many people experience an overwhelming urge to withdraw from social obligations and daily routines. This occurs because November occupies a specific transitional phase in fall—after completion but before renewal begins. The body turns inward, the heart quiets, and the spirit recognizes the need for release while external demands continue unchanged. The desire to disappear reflects a natural seasonal rhythm that modern life doesn't accommodate.
vanishing act
You wake up and it's already there: I want to disappear.
Not forever. Just gone for a while. Away from the texts, the plans, the performance of being present when everything in you wants to withdraw.
By November, showing up to the life you built feels impossible. Everyone else seems fine. You wonder what's wrong with you.
Your body knows. Your heart knows. Your spirit knows. November is the in-between—after what finished, before what begins. The pull to disappear is recognition that something completed and needs to fall.
the month between
Fall brought things to completion. Projects reached their end. Relationships found clarity. Parts of yourself that were becoming finally arrived.
November is what comes after. The space between ending and beginning. The darkness where nothing grows yet because nothing's meant to.
Trees stand bare. Daylight shrinks. What culminated returns to earth. This is threshold—the necessary pause between cycles where release happens so renewal can follow.
Culture doesn't recognize thresholds. Your job expects November output to match September's. Social plans carry forward as if the season stayed the same. Everything external demands you keep going.
Everything internal asks you to stop.
The pull inward is your body, heart, and spirit recognizing: something finished. Let it fall.
when three things align
Your body feels November's inward turn. The same body that moved through fall now wants stillness. The rhythm shifted from gathering to releasing. From motion to pause.
Your heart knows what's complete. The relationships that served fall, the connections that held you through culmination—some reached their end. Your heart is trying to let them rest. You keep holding on.
Your spirit recognizes the pattern. Completion, release, waiting, emergence. Transformation moves through thresholds. What finished must fall before new begins. The urge to withdraw is your spirit asking: what are you carrying that already completed its purpose?
Three things pointing to the same truth: November is for letting things end.
Because the ending itself is necessary. Because renewal doesn't come from pushing through the in-between. Because what's trying to fall needs permission to drop.
they're forcing it too
Too much operates as if seasons don't exist. School years begin in fall and demand that energy through winter. Work quarters ignore natural cycles. Social expectations assume constant availability.
Most people aren't fine. They're overriding the same pull you feel. They cancel and call it coincidence. They disappear for days, then return pretending nothing shifted. They force presence when everything in them wants to withdraw.
The ones who seem unaffected: some live by seasonal rhythms already. Some are at different points in their own cycles. Some are so disconnected from body, heart, and spirit that they don't feel the pull until something breaks.
You're not behind. You're just honest about standing in threshold.
the practice of release
The pull to disappear asks you to stop extending what already finished.
November asks you to stand in the in-between. After what was. Before what will be. In the darkness where nothing's meant to grow yet.
This means:
〰 Letting routines dissolve without replacing them
〰 Releasing commitments that served completion but don't serve threshold
〰 Allowing relationships to quiet when their season reached its end
〰 Stopping projects at their natural conclusion instead of forcing next steps
〰 Being less available as body, heart, and spirit turn inward
The disappearing is the practice. Creating space by releasing what's complete. Making room for what wants to emerge by letting what finished fall.
Trees don't apologize for bare branches. They stand in November and wait. They know threshold is necessary.
You can know this too.
how renewal actually works
Renewal grows from release. From actually letting what finished fall away. From standing in the space between cycles instead of filling it immediately.
This is why fall is its own beginning. Spring grows what winter held. Winter holds what fall released. Fall releases what reached completion.
The cycle requires threshold. November is threshold. Skipping it by staying busy doesn't speed up renewal. You just carry completion's weight into whatever comes next.
The new begins with the in-between. With letting what's finished return to earth. With space created through release.
November asks you to shed what completed. The version of yourself who built through fall. The connections that served that building. The commitments that made sense during motion but don't serve stillness.
Culture says start fresh by adding more. November teaches the opposite: start fresh by letting what finished fall. The pull inward is the beginning—making space for growth by honoring what already grew.
stand in the in-between
Notice what feels complete. What reached its natural end and is trying to fall.
Stop extending it. Stop defending it. Stop explaining why you're less available now than you were in September.
Cancel plans that don't serve threshold. Let your calendar have space.
Release without drama. Trees don't justify losing leaves.
Ask: What came to completion? What reached its end? What's trying to fall that I'm clutching?
Stand in the darkness between what was and what will be. This is threshold. This is how renewal begins.
November asks you to let the ending happen.
The life that moved forward through fall needs its pause. What completed must rest before anything new can begin.
You're not lost. You're standing between cycles. The pull to disappear is your body, heart, and spirit recognizing threshold and asking for release.
This is how renewal actually starts. Stand in the in-between. Let what's finished fall.
Signs November Is Asking You to Honor Threshold:
〰 What felt full in fall feels heavy now
〰 Commitments that energized you drain you
〰 You're maintaining relationships from habit
〰 Plans made during motion feel wrong for stillness
〰 Your body resists showing up
〰 "How are you?" makes you lie because the truth is "I'm between cycles"
Read our Journal.
The collection explores, the journal transforms. Get sanctuary in your inbox. Every other Sunday.
